Financial Infidelity - Overcoming Money Deception

Financial infidelity, though often overshadowed by more overt forms of betrayal, can quietly erode a relationship’s foundation.

Money lies can be small or significant, and studies show that most relationships include some level of infidelity with their finances.

Summary: Wealth Inside and Out® Podcast – “Financial Infidelity”

Today, we will learn:

>> 3:09: What is financial infidelity

>> 11:31 The impact on your relationship

>> 12:59: Where to get support

>> 17:22 How to gain back trust

Your Next Step Financial Assessment

If you need help on the best next step to secure your financial future and create a retirement you love, click here.

Free Retirement Plan Checklist Resource

You can go to https://themillionaireinsider.com/retirement-plan-checklist-registration/ to access this resource.

You’re going to love it. It provides an overview of the actions you need to take to avoid the biggest retirement planning mistakes people make. It will help you stop worrying about running out of money and ensure you can live and retire on your terms.

We share insights in this free Retirement Plan Checklist resource that many people don’t even consider. So again, you can go to the Retirement Planning Checklist.

One of the most common concerns women have is becoming a bag lady.

The Bag Lady Syndrome is a fear you will run out of money and cannot afford essentials.

Examples include expenses for housing, utilities, food, medical care, etc.

This guide is a great first step in creating a plan so you can stop worrying about money. Click here to access the guide.

Disclosure

All materials and intellectual property are copywritten by MillionaireSeries.com®.

This information is for educational purposes only. It is not intended to replace any advisor or specialist. It doesn’t provide investment, financial, tax, retirement, planning, or healthcare advice.

By reading this, you agree to hold MillionaireSeries.com® and its affiliates harmless for results achieved or not achieved.

What is Financial Infidelity?

At its core, financial infidelity stems from a lack of communication and transparency regarding money matters. Some signs of financial infidelity may include:

Hidden Spending

One partner makes significant purchases without informing the other.

Examples may include:

Luxury items (boats, cars, even houses)
Services (pedicures, facials, or golf)
Daily expenses ($7 gourmet coffee, lunch out each day, vending machine snack)

Now, some of these may have you saying, wait a minute. I get it. Many do not need to check with their partner to purchase a pedicure or facial. That said, it has to do with the financial agreement you have with your partner.

It also depends on how much money you and your partner make and have saved. If you earn a great salary and have millions invested, a coffee or massage can easily be part of your plan.

However, if you are struggling to pay your bills and are not saving enough to retire comfortably, spending on “wants” is not the best choice.

Regardless of what you spend money on and your financial agreement with your partner, hiding it could be financial infidelity.

Concealed Debts

Hiding debts intentionally and without the knowledge of one’s partner can lead to financial strain and trust issues. This gives the victim an unclear picture of their financial stability and future.

Common forms of secret debt include:

Credit card debt
Co-guarantor on a friend or child’s apartment
Car loans

Secret Accounts

Opening bank accounts or credit lines without the spouse or partner’s knowledge could be another sign. This can also include diverting funds or funneling money into undisclosed investments.

While I recommend transparency with money, there is one exception to that rule.

If you are not earning money and would be financially destitute if you left the relationship, or you are in an abusive relationship, this may warrant opening up a secret account that your partner doesn’t know about.

In my and many of my peer’s view, leaving someone penniless can be financial and emotional abuse. Creating a plan with a qualified financial advisor and attorney is essential before determining the best course of action.

Financial Lies

Financial lying refers to one partner concealing from or skewing financial information to the other. This deception can take various forms, like the examples we shared above.

Lying about your finances can be a sign of a more serious problem, so get the facts before you jump to any conclusion.

Why It’s a Problem

Broken Trust

Financial infidelity, like relationship infidelity, breaks the trust between partners, leading to feelings of betrayal and hurt. This can manifest in other parts of the relationship as well. The result of breaking that trust can create permanent damage that may not be repairable.

Money Problems

Hidden debts or overspending can create financial stress and uncertainty. The result is often discord and arguments about money.

The result is a variety of issues. Some may not be a big deal, while others are devastating.

Examples include:

Going broke or retiring without enough money
Lack of savings for emergencies
Increased liabilities and interest payments

Emotional Strain

Financial deception can cause emotional turmoil, creating distance and resentment between partners. It not only puts strain on the finances of a relationship but also impacts the:

Trust between partners
Future plans
Financial situation
Communication about other issues

The impact of financial infidelity is far-reaching and can heavily damage multiple aspects of a relationship.

How to Recover After Financial Infidelity

Seek Professional Guidance

Finding a professional to help your relationship recover can be an excellent way to gain insight into your situation.

Set Clear Boundaries

Establishing clear boundaries and expectations regarding financial responsibilities can help prevent future instances of financial infidelity. Define mutually agreed-upon guidelines for:

Spending
Saving
Investing

This ensures that both partners have a voice in financial decisions. You may need to close joint accounts until you get on track with your partner and financial plan.

Financial Planning

Collaborative financial planning can strengthen the partnership and promote shared goals.

Areas to focus on in your plan include:

A budget
Expenses (including wants and needs)
Long-term financial objectives and milestones.

By bringing your goals together, you and your partner can foster a sense of unity and purpose and better manage your finances.

Open Dialogue

Honest and open communication is a crucial step towards resolving financial infidelity. Partners should create a safe space without fear of judgment or reprisal.

Some potential topics to discuss are:

Goals (life and financial)
Concerns (in all areas)
Challenges or fears

Encourage each other to express feelings and concerns openly, which fosters a deeper understanding of each other’s perspectives.

Establish Transparency

Transparency is essential in building and maintaining trust and repairing the damage caused by financial infidelity. Both partners should commit to full disclosure of their financial activities, including income, expenses, debts, and assets.

Recap – “Financial Infidelity – Overcoming Money Deception”

Financial infidelity can undermine a relationship’s foundation and trust. Couples can take proactive steps to address underlying issues and rebuild trust. Open communication and a commitment to shared financial goals are key.

Remember that you are not alone. Seek professionals who can help you make informed decisions and protect your future.

Stay resilient and focused, and trust in your ability to create a brighter future for yourself.

If you want to create a secure financial future you love, start here: